Like many of you, my social media feed today has blown up with responses to the Supreme Court’s decision to legalize gay marriage. I have seen 3 types of responses from my Christian friends that concern me – 3 responses that I personally can’t embrace.
First, I won’t panic. Some seem to fear that the cause of Christ has been jeopardized by this 5-4 vote. I want to say to my calamitizing brothers and sisters: If you believe that God’s purposes can be thwarted by the actions of a human government, you need to get a bigger God. The sky is not falling. It is still right where God put it. He is still King of heaven and earth, and Lord of history. He is still the only Judge whose opinion has lasting significance. He has not lost an ounce of authority. Through the ages, the Gospel has done some pretty good work in cultures that it directly contradicts. Fear truly is unnecessary.
Second, I won’t celebrate. Some of my Christian friends are happy about the court’s decision, viewing it as a victory for love. I think their celebration comes from a genuine conviction that God loves all people, which is noble. But somewhere along the way they seem to have bought into the myth that loving someone means letting them have what they want. Real love for someone means wanting what is best for them. And what is best for someone is what God wants for them. Starting in literally the first chapter of the Bible, we see the “very good” story of people made in the image of God, made male and female, and from the second chapter of the Bible onward we see marriage consistently defined as a relationship between a man and a woman. The Bible’s prohibitions against homosexual behavior are not the words of out of touch old-timers that we can toss out now that they are no longer culturally popular; neither are they the rules of a killjoy deity who wants some people to be miserable. They are the gracious warnings of the God who made us and knows what will ultimately fulfill us and help us to flourish. The court’s decision strikes me as a national declaration that we know better than God on this matter of sexual ethics. I can’t get excited about that kind of declaration.
Third, I won’t spew venom. The response that troubles me most that I have seen from some Christians is hatred and anger. In their effort to “protect” the truth of Christ’s teaching (as if he needs our protection), they have moved 180 degrees from Christ’s character. Members of the LGBT community are not our enemies – they are our neighbors. They are not a “them” who are at war with “us.” If our only words about homosexuality are shouts of outrage, we will be pushing people away from the Savior who died to reach them. If our words, actions, and attitudes are not marked with kindness and mercy, then we have become even more un-Christlike than those we are bashing.
May God fill us with the hope that comes from knowing that he is secure on his throne. May he give us the wisdom to remember that he really is smarter than we are. May he make us magnetic with the love of Christ.
Marilyn West said:
This is absolutely WHY you are such an amazing Pastor. Thank you for these wise words that are truly God breathed and your maturity in Christ amazes me. I love, love, love my Pastor.
jblakemckinney said:
You are very kind, Marilyn!
Marilyn West said:
And you my Pastor are wise beyond your years! I have a cousin that is gay. I love him very much. I do not in any way condone his lifestyle but have seen family members reject him which in no way can ever show him the love of our Savior. God loves him, so I choose to, meanwhile praying for his salvation. Thank you for being such a caring shepherd to your “flock” who are very disturbed and saddened by this direction our country is choosing.
Andrea Carman said:
Thanks Blake for bringing this home with a balanced Godly view. It’s hard to know what to think but your post helped me to put things in perspective. I also am thankful for my Pastor.
Martha Griffin said:
I just altered a wedding gown for a sweet young girl who is to merry another women. I told her,” May God bless you and keep you.” She was real surprises that I would say that. I ment every word I said! God is in every persons picture if they only look.
Cheryl said:
I am a parent of a gay child (she’s 20). I have been heart wrenched for years on how to cope. My concern has and will always be for her spiritual well being. I just pray that she lives the life God wants for her. I don’t know what I will do one day when she comes to us with an announcement of a marriage. I can’t see myself being all excited and wrapped up in wedding plans like all my friends are with their daughters. Your post helped me to realize that the legalization of gay marriages is a “man”made law not a God made law. Society keeps making me feel like I’m a bad mother because I’m not jumping on the LGBT band wagon. I love my daughter and will never abandon her, but I don’t know how I will handle a wedding one day. Should I happily attend with the knowledge that it’s just “man” approved? Should I not attend at all because it’s not God’s way and risk losing my daughter from my life? I have cried many tears over this.
jblakemckinney said:
Thanks so much for sharing honestly about your struggle. Your situation helps us all to remember that this is a very personal issue, not just a political one. May God work powerfully in your daughhter’s life, and in your own life as you seek to be “full of grace and truth” like Jesus.
Mosaics said:
I can understand your pain. Even though I don’t have a homosexual child, I did almost lose him to the world. He became involved with an adulterous woman who was pulling him away from the Lord. I cried and agonized over it for about two years. I prayed to God, begging and pleading for help. I almost lost my own faith over it because I was not willing to wait on the Lord’s answer. But, ultimately, it was my son’s choice and if he chose Satan, I would have to let him go. I could not condone or accept his adulterous relationship. Look to the Scriptures for your answers. Do not let your emotions tell you what is right or wrong. If you do that, your emotions will lead you to acceptance of sin and eventually to condoning and defending it. I’ve seen it happen so many times. Luke 14:26, ““If any man comes to Me and does not have much more love for Me than for his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, and even his own life, he cannot be My follower.”
Cheryl said:
Thank you for your responses. I have come to the realization that it was my job to teach her the ways of Christ as a child. But now that she is an adult, her choices are between her and God, not me and God. My roll now is to pray fervently for her to grow even stronger in walk with Jesus, so that she can make choices that lead to Him. I ask you all to pray for me and my husband for strength.
john said:
We may not understand but God’s ways are not the same as ours. We will all be judged and answer for our sins. The gay life style is a sin and they will be judged for it. God’s word is very clear.
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Samuel Stricklin said:
Hello Blake,
I don’t know if you remember me or not. M yname is Sam (Samuel) Stricklin. I attended 2nd Baptist in Little Rock in the early 80’s. I remember you and your brother were a few years younger than I. I stumbled across you FB page from a suggestion of you being “someone I may know”, and noticed the link to the above blog entry.
Just wanted you to know how much I appreciate the your response. I came out as gay shortly after leaving OBU and have often struggled with the relationships with my Christian friends and family members. While some have been supportive, there were many that disowned me while others felt it their mission to “preach the gay away”, forever regaling me with scripture and their constant reminder that they were praying for my lost soul.
I wish I could share with them what you’ve written. You words are truly filled with “kindness and mercy” and an example of what I consider a true Christian.
Thank you again and as some have mentioned, I believe your church is lucky to have you.
Take care,
Samuel Stricklin
Dallas TX
Please say hello to your brother (Brian if I remember correctly).