Just recently a dear friend of mine tweeted this:
“Ever do homework for Bible study & be afraid to write/declare ur answers b/c u know the Lord’s going to do a work & enemy is likely to act?”
My response was: “only all the time!!!!!!”
Well that’s why this post has taken so long. We’ve been up to the “…love is not rude…” section of 1 Corinthians 13 for over a month and it’s my turn to blog. Not that I’m bitter or even suspicious (but I am a little) however it seems that I’ve been assigned all the attributes of biblical love with which I have the most trouble. And boy have I had trouble with this one lately. There, I said it. I’ve not wanted to be write this because: a.) I’ve been rude to Blake and b.) I know Satan’s going to attack further if I go there on this blog.
Here I go!
1 Corinthians 13:5 begins with the statement about love, “It does not dishonor others…” In many translations it says, “Love is not rude…” The amplified version adds “unmannerly” to how one who loves should NOT act. As you probably know, the word for love in 1 Corinthians 13 is AGAPE, the type of love God has for us. And since I am a Jesus follower, I am called to love like God. Unfortunately, I don’t always love like God…and unfortunately I have been rude, unmannerly, even dishonoring to the ones I love.
Even my husband.
How about you? Have you been rude to your spouse recently? Have you said something to him or her that you would NEVER let your children say to you or something you would NEVER say to your Bible study teacher? Have you neglected him or her in order to fulfill your own desires? Have you been rude in any way?
I love Blake so much, so why am I rude to him? Why are we often the most “unmannerly” with our spouses? Why are we the ugliest to those who know the most about us? I believe the essence of love, especially love in a marriage relationship, is submission. That means putting myself last. That means putting Blake first. When I’m rude to him it’s because I’m putting myself, my desires, my crazy emotions, and my fears first. I’m not even thinking about his desires, his emotions, his fears. If I would just stop and think before saying what comes so quickly to my mind perhaps it could make all the difference, not just in an isolated circumstance or situation but in our marriage altogether! This requires submitting to and trusting the One Who knows me better and loves me even more than Blake! And let’s just be honest, if I’m being rude to Blake chances are I’ve been awfully rude to Him as well. When I’m being unmannerly to Blake, it’s usually just a symptom of the deeper issue of not trusting or submitting to God Himself.
Thankfully His mercies are new every morning, so let’s try again. My challenge to myself and to you: Spend some time as soon as possible telling God thank you for His mercy. Spend some time asking your spouse for forgiveness. Then trust God enough to keep your mouth shut when you are tempted to be rude. Memorize Proverbs 15:4 with me…maybe even in the amplified version.
“A gentle tongue, with its healing power, is a tree of life, but willful contrariness in it breaks down the spirit.”